My Favorite Movies

This is the BEST acting role Mark Hamill was dared in a bar to play, (punch that Star Wars trilogy in the testicles with a fistfull of lightsaber courtesy of Cocknocker) especially if you do not count any of his voice-over work he's done as the Joker!

I'm sure if anyone thought much on this subject, Trickster suspiciously emulates another DC Comics foe from the 1989 Batman perfectly, with many original changes and twists done to the nemesis thanks to a genuine thespian "Starkiller"... Unfortunately the unique alternative Jack Napier didn't translate well into a live-action, camp serious, million dollars an episode show, so they inevidibly cancelled it! (yes it was funny as hell, but many in the early 1990's just called it annoying)
However, this evolved sense of this media-specific personality was so spectacular and innovative that he replaced the initial characteristics (that the network wanted this guy to vaguely copy as the Trickster) when he landed the voice role of Joker in the great Batman Animated Series!
YAY be triumph of non-conformity! Boo to the Time Warner monopoly that wanted to capitalized by Mickey Mousing earlier success and airing this very show, among other things.
Hooray however on freak originality despite direct attempts to copycat... (Flintstones for instance, Sonic The Hedgehog, Daredevil, Splinter Cell, Watchmen, Snatcher, Family Guy, Nosferatu, Jason Voorhees, Akira, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and of course Flash television series)

Okay, now who's up for Guyver? ;-P

You've see- Shut up, you've seen it... You have FUCKING seen this! You simply don't want to ADMIT having seen it, but I guarantee the VHS was popped in near as many times as Little Mermaid...

Oh, you're going to sit there and tell me that you don't remember a net being thrown over an invisible cartoon dragon, or even anything scenes involving the lighthouse?!
I KNEW IT! You've been on drugs this whole time, and so you can't recall a thing before about age 10 I take it? "BATMAN", huh? You've been telling that campfire story for YEARS, so of course you'd remember. Though let me just get something straight right now, Pot-Face: (hmph, the next Tracy villain?) There - AIN'T - no - bat.

"You shouldn't have turned the
gun on that kid, man. You sho-"
"You want your cut of this money
or not? Now shut up! SHUT UP."
Both punks freeze at the sudden, inexplicable sound of black boots crunching on gravel. They turn
slowly. Their jaws drop. - - - - - - -

At the edge of the roof, bathed in moonlight, is a black apparition.
Eddie freezes, a choked gurgle in his throat. Black figure advances
and spreads its arms, slowly,
majestically. Great shadowy
wings flap in the wind. On its
chest is the emblem of a bat,
in an oval yellow field, glowing
like a target in darkness.

(cue random sex scene)

Uniformed patrolmen drag
a brain-fried Nick past. - - -
"A bat, I tell you, A GIANT BAT
wanted me to do him a favor!"

That heartless BASTARD.... Barrymore's film "father" just hails a taxi and requests the airport. The penniless driver says he cannot afford the gas for that distance, so said dad hands the starving individual one dollar, then convinces him telepathically it's $500 bucks! ...back in 1984!!
WHAT THE HELL?! Why didn't he just trick a few banks out of real money, instead of hitting a poor guy where it hurts AND bringing someone's hopes up before driving them to the ground?

The lead character has lost any potential sympathy, so I stopped watching and just moved on...
(Usually though I've caught this Stephen King book desecrating mockery of a movie on television somewhere around the middle to ending of it, and there's this old man that "only a naive little girl could trust" because he has- *GASP* ...an eye-patch on!)

Alright. *sigh* Apparently, the law or FBI found out about this dude and his small daughter's special psychic powers, (even though he could simply have hid the fact that they even exist with his mind) and he has this limitation on using his powerful brain manipulation only a select number of times. (guy will get minor bloody nose when doing mind tricks, so he's afraid of doing too many at once and what ...bleeding to death?) An interesting bit of trivia for this movie is that Martin Sheen gets to play yet another novel's villain! (other time being in Dead Zone)

Okay sometime earlier, despite the best efforts of douche-bag dad, the government finally gets ahold of Drew Barrymore then persuades her to set a bunch of random objects on fire at their private military base, to merely test her abilities. Then after about a few hundred thousand dollars worth of supplies and equipment are one-by-one destroyed ablaze, they come to the conclusion that she can SET THINGS ON FIRE, (wow, I didn't really see that one coming) but then they still persist to hold her and run more tests.

All the while, little girl is asking to see her frickin' father and they're like "Not yet... You need to set more things on fire!" So finally, right about the time they've got her burning water, the midget gets fed up with captivity and I forget, (the idiots actually have her demolish materials their own building's constructed from) goes on this killing spree or whatever... It's pretty good, so go ahead and watch this if you're just looking to put another film under your belt.

Norton, of the infamous brothers who act and write as one, hated religion... all of it! Well to be more specific, he despises absolutely every OTHER belief that has ever been fabricated since before the dawn of time... except his own.

The origins of his distain stem from an obvious parallel to his career! You see up until the 21st Century (this film being released in '98) Mr. Ed Norton was quite the pariah among celebrities before his name was even wide spread publicly. With no desire to be alone, he had little hope but to flock with his fellow kin of merely unknown or bastardly bad actors. In these droves of resentful neo-nazis, often new-comers would join the pack and must learn from one's assigned mentor how to try and live with their exile from the elite majority-minority, and sin of sucking. Thus, fresh from fecal-festering for five and fro years, enters foxy ferret-f%$#in' Furlong. Together after getting use to each other, these Eds both head out to spread the 'ward of bitterness at Nazi rallies... toward good actors.
Anyways, since it's harder for a generic-looking actor to be some token character in any cast of co-stars (to get a foothold for much more prospering roles) than say a racial or culturally more unique person, much of Edward Norton's actor jealosy was directed toward any film thespian of another race. Though as Louis Leterrier recalls of the famous beating and arrest scene, "After watching I thought you really don't want cross this dude if you're black... cat or any other person of color.... and you really don't wanna get this damn guy very angry... EVER, or else... 'she will become one herself!'
News Interviewer: .....WHAT?!
Louis: *ahem* Sorry, I meant 'or she will become one herself'...."

Needless to say, Mister Leterrier has served a bit of jail time for his statement, and was forbidden to direct an Incredible Hulk sequel.
Luckly, for both us and Mister Norton, Ed was thrown into a rehab clinic and succeeded in becoming a greater and much well-respected actor! However for the fate of ze Furlong, starting out high before hitting rock-bottom was his downfall, for millions of people hated him so #%$ much since 1991, that children actually saved there allowances to pool for an assassin, and Mister Ed was wasted while taking a piss.

WHY hasn't anyone in Hollywood tried to rip-off the formula for this comedy movie masterpiece?!

I mean for god sakes, even people who HATE all the films done by John Hughes seem to love this movie, and Matthew Broderick's face is about a mile wide on this poster, so you'd think the ass-hole writers and directors who appreciate this pile of soda poprocks puke would at LEAST emulate an awful B-movie version with a goatee, instead of chucking out the most rancid Jersey Girl and Gigli bile you could possibly torture out of a fella with rabies.

...Anyways, this thing is EXACTLY like his other starring role in War Games (specifically just because he had a new computer in the mid' 80's that he uses to further the plot to a varying significance) except billions of peoples lives aren't endangered by a fuck-face and his Short Circuit girlfriend. Instead he has a ménage à trois with her and his best friend... during the daytime... on weekday before graduation... and inevidibly missing school because of this. Thus the film title becomes clear!

Of course, the 1980's pop culture back then was full of censoreship and bullshit, so the 3-and-a-half hour endurance match is masked with symbolism, metaphors, and a moral to the story theme. You're supposed to assume that Bueller promises to marry Mia Sara, then runs off leaving her with embriotic twins, and so later she settles for Cameron, then they divorce and she takes his many hard-earned millions. The sister, however, is pissed throughout the film about Ferris's "many adventures" until meeting with Charlie Sheen, at which point she finally becomes comfortable with her sexuality....

Lotte Schwartz (Cameron Diaz) enjoys being John Malkovich (the title actor playing himself) while sexually penetrating 40-Year-Old Virgin's wife with his penis... and also John Cusack has a very small cameo somewhere.

There can be only ONE word that describes the "complex" ideas for this film.... Lesbians with varying facial hair and male genitalia.

(what I meant was it's quite gay)

I highly suggest watching this after or even before watching Yojimbo! (though I seriously doubt my brother even realizes he already "reviewed" this film)

The title character, originally from the movie "Yojimbo", is mixed up in another samarai predicament, volenteering to help for minimal to zero compensation yet again. (considering that Sanjuro hasn't aged much if even a day and the tales aren't linked in anyway, this story could take place anytime post or prior it's prequel...)

By a stroke of luck, a group of samarai's conversation is over heard by Mifune, who interjects an opinion before saving their hide from 1000 swordsman sneak attack DEATH TRAP!

A few things lead to another and Kurosawa's number one Bobby DeNiro samarai silver-screen superstar suddenly becomes some princess-pursuing mutant Mario brother... Metal Gear style. (silent, stealthful, sudden death)

There is sly tip-toes around a few fortresses, some doulbe agent stuff on the side, and a bit of the P.O.W. business, but you'd really have to be watching the thing yourself to care about it...

SPOILER ALERT: EVERYBODY DIES at the very end, except, of course, the film's protagonists!

Worst anime ever, (and the fact that it's anime makes it MUCH worst than anything live-action) worst movie ever, and by far the worst adaptation ever. (*sobs* the manga was PERFECT and yet they defiled a masterpiece)


*sigh* ...yet another FIVE stars! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, . . . I don't understand. - (oL_O>"") . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .7. . . . .T . .

The continuity of Dragonball Z versus this film is off by miles!
The one thing that's for sure is this happens right after the arrival and defeat of all three Saiyans, since King Kai's helping out, Son Goku is alive, he mentions his son Gohan becoming a giant ape before, and he's familiar with the artificial moon trick Turles does...

However, the entire supporting cast of fighters are around as well including Piccolo, who were all dead by the end of the Saiyan Saga and only alive prior when Goku was dead, so it should be impossible since this takes place before the Namek trip and Goku couldn't become Super Saiyan.

(SHIT! I said too much already)

Predator... Project X... Prince Of Darkness... The Princess Bride... Robocop... Evil Dead 2: Dead By Dawn... Hellraiser... Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon... Nightmare On Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors... AKIRA... Adventures in Babysitting... Creepshow 2... Deathstalker II... Buster Keaton: A Hard Act to Follow... Eddie Murphy Raw... Empire of the Sun... Dragnet... Dirty Dancing... Doki Doki Panic... Ernest Goes to Camp... Fatal Attraction... Flowers in the Attic... Full Metal Jacket... G.I. Joe: The Movie... Goonies II... Hot Pursuit... Jaws: The Revenge... The Last Emperor... Lethal Weapon... Masters of the Universe... The New Adventures Of Mighty Mouse... Metal Gear... Street Fighter... Indiana Jones in Revenge of the Ancients... Necropolis... The Lost Boys... Police Academy 4: Citizens on Patrol... Ms. Pac-Man... The Quick and the Dead... Raising Arizona... Rampage... Revenge of the Nerds II: Nerds in Paradise... Scooby-Doo Meets the Boo Brothers... Superman IV: The Quest for Peace... Surf Nazis Must Die... Spaceballs... The Running Man... Roxanne... Teen Wolf Too... The Untouchables... Zombie vs. Ninja... Megaman... Final Fantasy... Howling III...


Everyone of these titles were available to watch or play back in 1987, so who would be insane enough to pass up all else to waste time on this?! ...i WOOD.


(the "iWood" now comes in red oak, hickery, or pine cone flavor)

Riki-Oh is a not-so-cheap martial arts thrill, being the first film in China to get an X-rating without nudity, and the thing "Daily Show" with Craig Kilborn took a clip from to introduce each Five Questions segment. (smash a fake head)
"You care not for power or money or even sex.... The only thing that satisfies your cravings... is WAR!" - Sean Connery (klingon proverb)