Lorenzo von Matterhorn (LorenzoVonMatterhorn)the couch
Lorenzo's Recent Reviews
"They're going to save the world . . . as long as they're home for dinner" Former superhero Jack Shepard, (also known as Captain Zoom), is called back to work to transform an unlikely group of ragtag kids into a new generation of superheroes at a privacy Academy and save the world from certain destruction. The project holds an audition of would-be members, most of whom possess useless or disgusting powers. In the end, Dylan, a 17-year-old boy who can turn invisible Summer, a 16-year-old girl with telekinetic powers Tucker, a 12-year-old boy with the power to enlarge any part of his body Cindy, a 6-year-old girl with super strength. "Zoom" is a kids' superhero flick based on the novel "Zoom's Academy" written by Jason Lethcoe. In it, Tim Allen stars as a has-been superhero who's tasked to train four young superheroes to battle a nemesis. With that, you pretty much know what to expect. Unfortunately, that's all. While the film has all what comprises a prototype of this milked-dry genre, the experience is overtly familiar and dull. Jack Shephard (Allen... nope, not Matthew Fox) was Captain Zoom, a superhero who can travel at superhuman speeds, and one of the members of the military-sponsored superhero group "Team Zenith." But he has since lost his powers after a military experiment has gone awry that also has his teammates killed. 30 years later Jack is brought back to train four youngsters with superpowers when a new malevolent threat from the past emerges. First of all, the script of Adam Rifkin and David Berenbaum doesn't attain new heights with their blunt dealing of a theme that's been done more excellently with "The Incredibles" and "Sky High." And director Peter Hewitt ("Garfield"), who clearly isn't exactly a master storyteller himself, has little to work from with such a dull and hollow material. All of the characters are perfunctory parts rather than humans portraying genuine conflicts. Also, for a film that's called "Zoom," the film drags: it lacks a sufficient amount of action. We're supposed to see the kids train, but all we're mostly shown are unfunny attempts at slapstick humor that the filmmakers assume would elicit laughters from the little tots among the audience (uhm, Courteney Cox tripping down and Chevy Chase getting slime on his face, anyone?). What constitutes for training involve at the most paint balls and a drive-thru chaos at a Wendy's restaurant. Yes, there's the climactic fight sequence at the end but it's too quick, unexciting, and not enough by a mile for a film that has terribly dragged along. Ultimately, what transpires is a terribly unfunny movie that wears out its welcome faster than its main character runs.
Lorenzo's Favorite Movies
"Being the adventures of a young man whose principal interests are rape, ultra-violence and Beethoven." In future Britain, charismatic delinquent Alex DeLarge is jailed and later volunteers for an experimental aversion therapy developed by the government in an effort to solve society's crime problem... but not all goes to plan.
REVIEWA Clockwork Orange is exhilarating, perverse and thought provoking all at the same time. A technical achievement from master director Stanley Kubrick, virtuoso and boundary pushing filmmaking at its best. So many memorable shots litter the screen. Alex, played by Malcolm McdDowell, is possibly the most evil, despicable character ever put on screen, but is scarily charming and sympathetic. Kubrick displays his talents by somehow getting us to like and care about this little monster. Its probably because the world around him is equally monstrous and vile, the government willing to bypass a man's will in order to prevent crime, gangs of youths who care not for society. The film is set in a dystopian future, with a post modern look and pop art decoration and costumes. The use of music is commendable, and the opening theme played during the credits is just as disturbing and exciting as the film that follows. The point of the film is that we aren't human if we don't have control over our own desires, that having free will is crucial to society, even if some people want to do nothing but harm others. Its also a comment on human nature, that our will is the source of our evil nature, but again without it we aren't human. A Clockwork Orange is a masterpiece in its highest form.
"They're making memories tonight!" An angel helps a compassionate but despairingly frustrated businessman by showing what life would had been like if he never existed.
REVIEWPerennial Christmas classic about George Bailey (Stewart's best acting performance, one for the time capsule), an idealistic dreamer whose out-of-reach plans for himself are constantly set aside for his family and the town he helped in more ways than one. One of the best films ever made about a man's universal struggle with what he wants and what he does resulting with the immortal question: What would life be like if I were never born? Stewart's performance depicts every emotion superbly and facing suicide shows just what a complex character interpretation he has. His salvation comes in the form of Clarence, his guardian angel still trying to earn his wings, who shows him exactly how things would be had he not existed. Best scene: after Stewart is refused entrance by his mother he races into an intense wide/close-up and the registering of fear, horror and finally understanding that spreads across his face is ultimately moving, chilling and heart-breaking all at once. My favorite moment; if you're not moved by this, you 're simply not human. Dare not to sing along at the end to "Auld Lang Syne" and dare not to cry. Definitely a film ahead of its time (originally a box-office flop and snubbed royally at the Oscars losing largely to the WWII American classic "The Best Years of Our Lives"). Frank Capra's masterpiece was his and Stewart's personal favorite films.