John Hein (aSpaceCowboy)

Austin, TX

John's Recent Reviews


Robin Hood: Men in Tights Robin Hood: Men in Tights PG-13
Ugh... what's to like about this movie? No, seriously, what'sto like? Sure it's Mel Brooks', but the humor is less than "borderline". I was in shame by how low the cracks were. I just couldn't believe how unfunny this was.

Yep, that's right, Mel Brooks' brings forth his spoof of Robin Hood. As King Richard is away, Prince John is left to look after things, but gets engulfed in his power. Robin is helping a former cellmate of his - Asneeze - look after his son - Achoo. So, he returns to England and finds himself faced with the law, present with his one true love, and allied with a bunch of men... in tights.

Anyway, long story short, this movie was not funny and I'll tell you why. The jokes were lame, too many self-spoofed puns came out of Brooks. It seemed rushed, the literal jokes were off balance, a number of times someone would look directly into the camera.. even when they weren't breaking the forth wall. It was a pathetic attempt at humor

[more will come later... and sorry for the lacking speech of my review]

John's Favorite Movies


Memento Memento R
This is a very unique thriller. this type of movie is rarely seen. The start of the movie appears to be the end, therefore you assume it's all about reviewing the previous events to see how it relates to the opening scene. But it's not that way at all. it's shown in reverse. the movie is playing backwards. it's the kind of movie that doesn't entirely make sense until to reach the end. it's just amazing how this was filmed. there was an extensive use of foreshadow that tends to give you a "Deja Vu" feeling as the film progresses. i dont want to ruin anything, but the ending will surprise you as it surprised me. it can be a difficult movie to follow so you may need to see this a few times before you fully grasp it's message. honestly, this is one of the best revenge movies anyone will ever see. Leonard seems to forget everything after an hour or so unless he really consintrates on what his doing and where he is. But, he can't make new memories and is stuck with the ones he has up to his wife's murder. There was a point in this movie where he wakes up and believes his wife was next to him in bed and went to the bathroom. I believe he didn't ever think his wife was actually dead. I believe he created this image in his mind and tattooed what he wants to believe on his body so he'd continue life with a neverending vengeance. Or maybe being half asleep just creates an unconsious dillusion...
Sleuth Sleuth PG
This psychological thriller deserves more appreciation. It has a brilliant script, beautiful scenery, and two exciting performances by two very talented actors. There?s not a bore or dull moment in plain view which gives Sleuth a near perfected work of art.

A young hairdresser named Milo Tindle is invited to a greeting with his lover?s husband, Andrew Wyke. It?s all just fun and games with the ol? prow. A simple conversation over the woman that ties them together ? Marguerite ? soon turns into a rather funny sort of action, but is taken too far when a gun is fired and a man disappears. But it?s only now, that the game truly begins.

It?s difficult to say how much I admire the plot without unveiling any hidden aspects? but I?ll try. A game is all it is, really. Just a game; A ravage struggle between two men which is taken too seriously. The way it precedes is so non- expecting. There?s nothing predictable about it. Just when you think you?ve got everything figured, a new surprise comes a-knockin?. All the twists and turns will make your head spin. You really have no idea what?s going to happen next, but you desperately want to find out. Simply put, it?s a funhouse ith no escape. You become a part of the game.

BOOM! That was the sound of Michael Caine blowing your mind He plays a shady, devious, little twitter whom reinvents the game?s rules. He?s cunning, stealthy, crude, crass, sly. Almost villain-like. He captures the essence of a real maniac. Not in the sort of ?serial killer? manner, but more like that of a trickster.

Laurence Olivier was the master of the show! He brought so much energy and life to his character. In his funhouse of toys and games he actually seemed like a kid. The innocence, sent, smile, joy and freedom felt natural and convincing. He wasn?t like a kid, he was a kid.

All of enchantment and majestic of these two flawless performances made Sleuth a mastering piece of art. All it had was two actors ? TWOACTORS! It worked out more than expected? Let the games begins.

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