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Best Crap Movies


  • Meet the Spartans

    Meet the Spartans (PG-13, 2008)

    Sean MaGuire, Carmen Electra, Ken Davitian, Kevin Sorbo, Diedrich Bader
    From the creators of Scary Movie and Date Movie comes this tongue-in-cheek parody of the sword-and-s... read moreandal epics, dubbed Meet the Spartans. The 20th Century Fox production was written and directed by the filmmaking team of Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer. Sure, Leonidas may have nothing more than a cape and some leather underwear to protect him from the razor-sharp swords of his Persian enemies, but that won't stop the brave leader and his team of 13 warriors from defending their beloved homeland against a powerful invading force that includes the likes of a mutant Paris Hilton, the Transformers, the Ghost Rider, and Rocky Balboa. ~ Jeremy Wheeler, Rovi
  • Eragon

    Eragon (PG, 2006)

    Ed Speleers, Michael A. Mehlmann, Tamás Deák, Jeremy Irons, Sienna Guillory
    Industrial Light and Magic special-effects wizard Stefen Fangmeier makes the leap into the director'... read mores chair with this coming-of-age fantasy concerning a young boy whose discovery of a mysterious dragon egg leads him on a predestined journey to become a Dragon Rider and defend his peaceful world against an evil king. Based on the best-selling novel by Christopher Paolini, Eragon tells the tale of the titular character (Ed Speleers), a humble farm boy living in the land of Alagaësia, whose life is forever changed when he discovers that he has been chosen to fight the most powerful enemy his world has ever known. Jeremy Irons, John Malkovich, and Djimon Hounsou co-star in a film produced by Davis Entertainment and adapted from the novel by screenwriters Peter Buchman, Larry Konner, and Mark Rosenthal. ~ Jason Buchanan, Rovi
    • fb764282243
      fb764282243: crap movie! so boring i almost fell asleep wtching it!
      Reviewed 2 years days ago
    • fb1537141575
      fb1537141575: Total crap. I love this book series, but they cut so many corners on this movie it comes across like they
      Reviewed 3 years days ago
    • damgirlyoucrazy
      damgirlyoucrazy: . It ain't my kind of crap/movie... but I guess it was O.K. If you're into that sort of thing; ie. nonsence
      Reviewed 5 years days ago
  • 30 Days of Night

    30 Days of Night (R, 2007)

    Josh Hartnett, Melissa George, Danny Huston, Ben Foster, Mark Boone Jr.
    In Barrow, Alaska, the northernmost town in the United States, the winter sun sets and does not rise... read more for 30 days and nights. From the darkness comes an evil force that strikes terror on the town, and all hope is pinned on a husband-and-wife cop team.
    • fb749469377
      fb749469377: . Josh what were you thinking with this crap?? Why Josh, WHY?!!
      Reviewed 2 years days ago
    • fb100000291135171
      fb100000291135171: . Well that and the vampires looked like crap!!!!
      Reviewed 2 years days ago
    • fb771695053
      fb771695053: This movie is crap.. I fell asleep in it twice!!! I think that if you just take it as it is and dont ask questions
      Reviewed 3 years days ago
  • Silent Hill

    Silent Hill (R, 2006)

    Radha Mitchell, Sean Bean, Laurie Holden, Deborah Kara Unger, Kim Coates
    The eerie and deserted ghost town of Silent Hill draws a young mother desperate to find a cure for h... read moreer only child's illness. Unable to accept the doctor's diagnosis that her daughter should be permanently institutionalized for psychiatric care, Rose flees with her child, heading for the abandoned town in search of answers -- and ignoring the protests of her husband. It's soon clear this place is unlike anywhere she's ever been. It's smothered by fog, inhabited by a variety of strange beings and periodically overcome by a living "darkness" that literally transforms everything it touches. As Rose begins to learn the history of the strange town, she realizes that her daughter is just a pawn in a larger game.
  • Hostel: Part II

    Hostel: Part II (R, 2007)

    Lauren German, Roger Bart, Heather Matarazzo, Bijou Phillips, Richard Burgi
    Three young Americans studying in Rome set off for a weekend trip when they run into a beautiful mod... read moreel from one of their art classes. Also on her way to an exotic destination, the gorgeous European invites the coeds to come along, assuring them they will be able to relax and rejuvenate. Will the girls find the oasis they are looking for? Or are they poised to become victims for hire, pawns in the fantasies of the sick and privileged from around the world who secretly travel here to savor more grisly pursuits?
    • fb1834852151
      fb1834852151: . I wonder what made Tarantino want to produce this crap?
      Reviewed 4 years days ago
    • fb100000264881948
      fb100000264881948: . but as far as the storyline was concered was crap. This film contained what the first did not a original storyline; yet it lacked everything the
      Reviewed 4 years days ago
    • angelzp27
      angelzp27: better than the first but thats not hard, the first one was absolute crap: half porn, half blood and thats about it. this one had more of a story and the girl's revenge
      Reviewed 6 years days ago
  • Disaster Movie

    Disaster Movie (PG-13, 2008)

    Matt Lanter, Vanessa Minnillo, Carmen Electra, Kim Kardashian, G-Thang
    The filmmaking team behind Date Movie and Meet the Spartans is back with a comedy spoof sending up d... read moreisaster movies in this Lionsgate production. Matt Lanter, Vanessa Minnillo, G-Thang, and Kim Kardashian head up the cast as a group of concerned citizens willing to do whatever it takes to save planet Earth from being incinerated by falling meteors or overrun by rabid chipmunks. Along the way, everything from High School Musical to Cloverfield gets the parody treatment. Carmen Electra and Tony Cox co-star. ~ Jeremy Wheeler, Rovi
    • fb1454567029
      fb1454567029: same old crap making fun of the blockbusters, oh well you gotta make money somehow and I rented it so there y
      Reviewed 2 years days ago
    • fb667537744
      fb667537744: not worth the time it takes to take a dump. I thought Meet the Spartans was bad, but this is the a
      Reviewed 2 years days ago
    • fb814183867
      fb814183867: . Everything these goon of directors come out with is garbage. Please do not watch this crap!
      Reviewed 3 years days ago
  • Vampires Suck

    Vampires Suck (PG-13, 2010)

    Matt Lanter, Chris Riggi, Ken Jeong, Jenn Proske
    "Vampires Suck" is a comedy about contemporary teen angst and romance movies. Becca, an anxious, non... read more-vampire teen, is torn between two boys. Before she can choose, Becca must get around her controlling father, who embarrasses Becca by treating her like a child. Meanwhile, Becca's friends contend with their own romantic issues -- all of which collide at the prom.
    • fb841840262
      fb841840262: . So cheesy and boring. Watch disaster movie or meet the Spartans then this crap, way better!
      Reviewed 2 years days ago
    • Plamtree
      Plamtree: funny at times but they pushed it a bit and i was really hoping it was gunna bash the crap out of all VAMPS....but sadly it only followed that G.D.Twi stuff!Ahhh COME ON H.W let me in!!!
      Reviewed 3 years days ago
    • AusChic
      AusChic: ... Pretty crap humour!
      Reviewed 3 years days ago
  • The Blair Witch Project

    The Blair Witch Project (R, 1999)

    Heather Donahue, Michael Williams, Joshua Leonard, Bob Griffith, Jim King
    Combining Hi-8 video with black-and-white 16 mm film, this film presents a raw look at what can happ... read moreen when college students forego common sense and enter the world of voodoo and witchcraft. Presented as a straightforward documentary, the film opens with a title card explaining that in 1994, three students went into the Maryland back woods to do a film project on the Blair Witch incidents. These kids were never seen again, and the film you are about to see is from their recovered equipment, found in the woods a year later. The entire movie documents their adventures leading up to their final minutes. The Blair Witch incident, as we initially learn from the local town elders, is an old legend about a group of witches who tortured and killed several children many years ago. Everyone in town knows the story and they're all sketchy on the details. Out in the woods and away from their parked car (and civilization), what starts as a school exercise turns into a nightmare when the three kids lose their map. Forced to spend extra days finding their way out, the kids then start to hear horrific sounds outside their tents in the pitch-black middle of night. They also find strange artifacts from (what can only be) the Blair Witch, still living in the woods. Frightened, they desperately try to find their way out of the woods, with no luck. Slowly these students start to unravel, knowing they have no way of getting out, no food, and it's getting cold. Each night they are confronted with shrieking and sounds so haunting that they are convinced someone is following them, and they quickly begin to fear for their lives. The film premiered in the midnight movie section at the 1999 Sundance Film Festival. ~ Chris Gore, Rovi
    • fb100000114197636
      fb100000114197636: I can't tell if this is inventive or a complete waist if crap. I lean toward a waist of crap.
      Reviewed 8 months days ago
    • fb594747508
      fb594747508: t your own trails, camp off the beaten path or generally explore the land this movie will scare the crap out if you. For me, it us this situational fear that hits home. As an outdoors man that travels
      Reviewed 2 years days ago
    • fb100000161185699
      fb100000161185699: This was such a pile of crap! I saw it at the $1.50 theater, and overpaid! And I was treated!
      Reviewed 2 years days ago
  • Whiteout

    Whiteout (R, 2009)

    Kate Beckinsale, Gabriel Macht, Tom Skerritt, Columbus Short, Alex O'Loughlin
    A U.S. marshall tracking a vicious murderer through the Antarctic must locate the killer before the ... read moresun sets for six months, or risk being trapped in the dark with the madman for months on end in director Dominic Sena's adaptation of the graphic novel series by Greg Rucka. U.S. marshall Carrie Stetko (Kate Beckinsale) has been stationed at Antarctica's South Pole research base for two years, and now after turning in her resignation she's looking forward to finally going home. The last plane out leaves in just three days, and just after that Antarctica will not see the sun again for another 24 weeks. Then, just 72 hours before she is set to escape the coming darkness, a body is discovered in the ice -- prompting the first murder investigation ever to take place on the desolate Antarctic Circle continent. Little does Carrie realize that she's suddenly been thrust into a mystery over 60 years in the making, and that the killer is ready to strike again in order to protect a grim secret. Now, as the death toll starts to rise, loyalties shift, and a massive series of whiteouts blow bitter winds across the frozen landscape, the U.S. marshall who wanted nothing more than to escape the cold must work around the clock to catch a killer before the blinding white snow gives way to the deadly darkness of winter. ~ Jason Buchanan, Rovi
    • fb1790424557
      fb1790424557: Holy Crap! This is a bad movie! While at first glance it looks interesting -just wait - it's not.
      Reviewed 4 years days ago
    • fb1025691260
      fb1025691260: .5 because of gabriel macht's ability to wear flannel...other than that, this movie was crap.
      Reviewed 4 years days ago
    • fb540960393
      fb540960393: utter crap! Hollywood at it's best turfing out rubbish
      Reviewed 4 years days ago
  • Quarantine

    Quarantine (R, 2008)

    Jennifer Carpenter, Steve Harris, Jay Hernandez, Johnathon Schaech, Columbus Short
    Television reporter Angela Vidal and her cameraman are assigned to spend the night shift with a Los ... read moreAngeles Fire Station. After a routine 911 call takes them to a small apartment building, they find police officers already on the scene in response to blood curdling screams coming from one of the apartment units. They soon learn that a woman living in the building has been infected by something unknown. After a few of the residents are viciously attacked, they try to escape with the news crew in tow, only to find that the CDC has quarantined the building. Phones, internet, televisions and cell phone access have been cut-off, and officials are not relaying information to those locked inside. When the quarantine is finally lifted, the only evidence of what took place is the news crew's videotape.
    • fb604849901
      fb604849901: . Movies like this really make you wonder if crap like this could happen. Creepy!
      Reviewed 3 years days ago
    • fb832115453
      fb832115453: Crap American version of the brilliant Spanish movie REC
      Reviewed 3 years days ago
    • fb863940516
      fb863940516: . this movie starts off as crap then slowly turns into a real movie
      Reviewed 4 years days ago